It sure was a nice day for making some changes yesterday.
There was something in the wind that was finally blowing warm, through the open window, that seemed to call me...
I felt like a bird that needed to fly, but you know, things can make you feel tied to the earth, even without any sign of the ropes... and so can people, especially ones you care about...
On the other hand, sometimes ones you care about and things you have can set you free too...
It must be SPRING because at least once a year, this happens....
I woke up with the feeling that I needed to immerse myself in something tangible and get rid of things I don't need, things I don't use, and things I love but have no place for... Things someone else may need or have a use for here and now... I just needed to feel the love flowing and the breezes blowing, and to lighten the load... so I did...
I went on-line and sent a few notes out to long-time friends at a distance, and got some back. I know it felt as good to them as it did to me. We know one another's stories, and it's nice to add a chapter here and there, or go back to complete a chapter or page we might have missed out on... but it's the love and caring that matter most... here and now.
I looked around me at the clutter that surrounded me. I reminded myself that if I didn't use this or that in a few months, it wasn't necessary... unless it was something truly meaningful. I looked at how disorganized the space around me had become. It wasn't very comforting to know that to get to this thing I wanted to use, I had to get through a bunch of things I had simply been saving... thinking I would find the time and desire to sort through them at some point. They really weren't USEFUL things.
Then, for the first time, I turned a critical eye to the three ring binders I have, filled with poems and stories, and thought of the journal pages filled with memories. Then I thought of how fast life moves, and how any memories that are worth holding onto are in my heart and mind, and can be rekindled if there's ever time to do so. Photo albums, properly labeled, tell it all far better.
I looked at the binders with the poems I'd written through the years, knowing how some of those were really good... but did I want to take the time to go through them page by page? I decided it's really not important enough to bother with. I can rekindle the memories if I choose to, and probably write much the same as i did back then, if I have a reason to do so. Noone in the future will have the time or desire to go through all of that either. I have a few, and that will suffice.
( The same is true of the things I saved from my children's lives. Oh, it's nice to hold onto certain things, the first shoes,the baby book of notable moments, some little drawings or the really special toys or books, but more than a boxful per child is too much. Again, photos do the trick, for the most part. )
I don't have a lot of keepsakes from the past... but even so, how many things does a person need to remind them of the good times? If you're busy looking at the good old days, you miss making good new memories. There are antiques stores and museums where you can visit to rekindle memories. Let others save it for the majority of us, so we have time to LIVE.
Not so long ago Laura Ingalls Wilder's books were very popular. But you know, it was her memories, recorded when she was a senior citizen, that people read about and re-lived. The little house on the prairie no longer existed, nor did the tin cup she got for Christmas. The land on which it stood is still there, and she gave directions to it if someone wanted to go and stand there and picture what it was like. It was the last house she lived in that still stood. Those things that were in it were those she used til the day she died... and the few precious keepsakes she was able to hold onto through the years. But you know she couldn't have saved a whole lot, living as they did. And yet, from what little remained, and from the memories she re-kindled, many felt as if they lived with her, experienced it all with her, and knew her well... and in a sence, they did.
"If it's not something I've used in a year, unless it's something truly special and irreplacable, " I reminded myself, " let it go... take a picture of it, and let it go." It was in connecting to the people who are dear to me, while letting go of those things that hold fond memories of the past, and holding onto those things I need and use here and now, that I made the steps to free myself and feel the love flowing back.
At the end of the day, I looked around the room, and it felt lighter and brighter, and so did I. I went on-line, opened a couple of 'windows', and connected with some of my newer friends, offered some of the things I have that I thought they might like to have, for free, and the love and laughter flowed...
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